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May 9, 2013
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Chicago = Must eat hot dog. And everything else.
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April 20, 2013
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Pre show = pre death. Yes this is day 2 of Chicago deep …
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April 20, 2013
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Breakfast, Lunch and winner!
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April 18, 2013
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Going healthy with a Cheeseburger pizza from Avalanche be…
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April 18, 2013
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We're visiting your Auntie Anne, bring your Lipitor and d…
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April 18, 2013
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"Your name?"
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April 11, 2013
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Finally!
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April 3, 2013
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My screaming sugar highed children and I thank @elischees…
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April 3, 2013
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Jalapeño cheese bread! And you say there is no God.
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April 1, 2013
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My 3 year old: What is that?
Me: Daddy's medicine.
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March 30, 2013
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Pre-show Roanoke. From Thelma's Chicken and Waffles
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March 29, 2013
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My Ethnic food. Thx whoever gave me this stuff.
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March 29, 2013
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Thx @pacetre these are amazing! See u tonight in Evansvil…
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March 26, 2013
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All great restaurants should come with babysitters. Thx …
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March 24, 2013
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Thanks The Plaid Cookie Company. ThePlaidCookie.com
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March 23, 2013
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My last Texas meal. I had to.
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March 21, 2013
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Is this pastry supposed to look like a circumcision gone …
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March 20, 2013
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And then these two weirdos behind us pulled out guitars a…
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March 20, 2013
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Looking at Mexican food makes my mouth sweat.
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March 19, 2013
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I hate sharing.
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March 17, 2013
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I love a clever menu but I prefer the bulletpoints.
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March 15, 2013
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It's so cool how they can now make strawberries with no f…
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March 15, 2013
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Another reason to love the South.
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March 13, 2013
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Why are all the ladies at the gym looking at me like i'm …
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February 28, 2013
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I need a drink cozy that says "I'm a pervert with no sens…
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February 14, 2013
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Play
Sitting in a Chili's Too at 6am as Wham! Is played. Buck…
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February 14, 2013
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The native food of all airports.
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February 13, 2013
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Oh cool this hotel gave me 2 apples, a pear and 2...other…
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February 7, 2013
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Saw this and thought of @jeanniegaffigan then I thought o…
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February 2, 2013
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Photo by @theCoreyMelton
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February 2, 2013
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Whole Foods more like Whole Population. #TooCrowded
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January 27, 2013
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My date John DeBella and his $100 cheesesteak #barclaypr…
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January 26, 2013
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I can't believe this cheesesteak is only a dollar. #barcl…
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January 19, 2013
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It is amazing the lengths we will go in order to make kal…
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January 2, 2013
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Thx @TullysCoffee for the free coffee. This is how drug d…
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January 1, 2013
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The cause of my death could be listed as "spent holidays …
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December 30, 2012
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In Wisconsin even the Christmas decorations are edible. …
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December 30, 2012
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Thx @tjwoodard
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December 30, 2012
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Thx @tjwoodard
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December 29, 2012
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Which beer should I choose?
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December 29, 2012
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The pre show meatloaf cupcake. Thx @pabsttheater
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December 25, 2012
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I guess he is my son.
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December 25, 2012
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I don't know why my in-laws thought this was a re-gift.
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December 25, 2012
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Thankfully in Wisconsin this is a Christmas dinner side d…
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December 25, 2012
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Day two of aioli, the vampire killer mayonnaise.
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December 22, 2012
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Great another thing I know nothing about.
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December 22, 2012
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Service is amazing at @milwaukeehilton these guys were gr…
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December 20, 2012
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Oh. No! @benandjerrys you owe me a computer...and more ic…
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December 19, 2012
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Jim Gaffigan Pale Ale available @PabstTheater 12/29, 30 &…
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December 19, 2012
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Teaching healthy eating habits.
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December 15, 2012
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Nailed it!
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December 9, 2012
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Thx for keeping my expectations low.
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December 6, 2012
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.@benandjerrys = happy kids. Thx @benandjerrys The screa…
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December 3, 2012
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Proof I live in a dangerous neighborhood.
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December 3, 2012
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See, you don't have to sell out.
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November 29, 2012
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Is it still necessary for espresso machines to be the siz…
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November 27, 2012
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My reward for being awake at this ungodly hour.
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November 25, 2012
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How to pay 25 dollars for coffee (before tip)
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November 24, 2012
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Had Thanksgiving last night at "Tournament of Kings" at E…
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November 15, 2012
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For school my 6 year old was asked to list 4 thing he was…
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November 11, 2012
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There are so many turnovers in the Bears/Texans game I’m …
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November 10, 2012
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Thx @CrifDogs . I need my energy for show two Apollo #ny…
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October 8, 2012
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Intermission. "Do we get to keep this?" This might be my…
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October 8, 2012
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Big thanks to @jeanniegaffigan for packing this. #anniem…
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October 5, 2012
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Proof: it's not always happy ending.
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September 29, 2012
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The best baby gift we've received so far!
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September 27, 2012
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All the food gifts people are sending are delicious! But …
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September 23, 2012
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Just told my 3-year old cotton candy is just blue hair. #…
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September 22, 2012
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How did they make this Dora ice cream look so much like D…
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September 19, 2012
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"Let's put some delicious peanut butter inside a deliciou…
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September 17, 2012
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Living healthy feels good!
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September 2, 2012
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You know how Jim Beam, jalapeños and sunflower seeds have…
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August 25, 2012
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Eating heathy at PDX. So fun! #sarcasm #tryingtoimpres…
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August 18, 2012
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They should rename this the sleeping pill.
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August 18, 2012
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Thx Cincy! Pittsburgh next! Then the diet.
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August 16, 2012
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Can someone just order for me? I'm exhausted from readin…
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August 14, 2012
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I'll have my beer sans ass, thanks.
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August 14, 2012
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Nothing says I'm a fan like an unhealthy dessert.
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August 13, 2012
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Pre-show snack. Thx Panama City!
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August 13, 2012
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Spotted in its natural habitat.
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August 10, 2012
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Slow down @jeanniegaffigan! #mrswilkes #savannah
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August 9, 2012
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Thx Charleston. Savannah next. Why if I lived in the lo…
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July 28, 2012
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Thanks to whoever gave me this. I think. Hampton Beach t…
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July 27, 2012
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Had to have some of New England's finest tonight. Hampton…
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July 25, 2012
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The American Tempura #ohiostatefair
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July 25, 2012
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Going healthy at the Ohio State Fair. Show tonight if I …
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July 24, 2012
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Thx Syracuse. Tomorrow night Ohio State Fair with @billy…
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July 24, 2012
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Last night: Vive poutine!
This morning: Le boo poutine.…
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July 23, 2012
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As you wish Canadian candy bar!
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July 18, 2012
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What is the difference between buying a 3 yr old ice crea…
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July 15, 2012
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The only thing worse than Burger King is waiting for Burg…
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July 3, 2012
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One of the only things I do well.
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June 30, 2012
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Why I don't eat healthy.
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June 13, 2012
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Ok we get it. You're open.
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May 9, 2012
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One of the warning signs of depression.
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April 28, 2012
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Good morning from the airport.
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April 17, 2012
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March 25, 2012
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Thx Williamsport CAC. This should come with Lipitor.
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March 22, 2012
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Thx for the gift. I'm only going to eat this whole bag …
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March 22, 2012
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Thx Heidi. This is also the packaging for bacon sunscree…
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March 22, 2012
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Oklahoma Joe's = best meals I've ever eaten at one time.
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March 22, 2012
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Bringing the family to eat at gas station.
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March 22, 2012
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Thx Sullivan's amazing steaks . KC pressure is on.
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March 21, 2012
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Thanks Omaha for show and this. KC Thurs night .
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March 19, 2012
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Thx ladies. Here's proof people want me dead.
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March 19, 2012
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This is just nuts!
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March 18, 2012
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Me & @michaelianblack at @zombieburger
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March 12, 2012
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"Por un bagel, yo no soy." Jose Marti if he saw this bage…
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March 8, 2012
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Why can't everywhere be like this?
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February 28, 2012
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"I could make you edible." - Mayonnaise to Cabbage
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February 21, 2012
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"Organic" means diet, right?
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February 17, 2012
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Here's a pic of @ToddGlass reprimanding while eating ice …
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January 19, 2012
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What flavor is this one, salt water? That's what it taste…